I sat in the front yard on the bench tonight, as the sun was setting. Tears running down my face, I once again asked myself 'WHY...?' Why did I allow myself to go and place my hand on the door knob, opening the door to self discovery???
At times staying in the dark corner of what seems like a locked room is safer, less painful. Here, numb to the joys of love, passion, eyes open to just how large the world really is, outside of my wooden chair pushed up near the computer where I would dream.
Yet, I did venture out as one shielding my eyes from the brightness. New to the sensation of feeling, realizing with the smile of child learning to ride a bike, that I too can possess companionship beyond a quick dip of the hand as if to only moisten, but one of fathomable depth.
Now I squint my eyes shut tightly as to declare I saw nothing, my eyes never were opened. My senses detach from awareness. NO!This world is too lonely. Too quiet. I should have stayed in the ignornace of my dark room
